January 23, 2007

The Hardest Thing Ever

He you become a believer, God will rain his blessings upon you. Ask and ye shall receive. You will go to heaven, where the streets are paved with gold. You will be an angel and be able to bask in the glory of the Lord forever. Etc. etc. etc.......

How many times as a believer have you heard the lines above to describe what becoming or being a "christian" is all about. I call it the "Christian Lottery" line that is given to non-believers in order to get them to convert. Why does the mainstream evangelical complex lie to gain converts. Because to them, the end justifies the means. To me, it means that being a believer and a servant of God, is the biggest let down that there is.

He will purify us by throwing us in the fire, as a goldsmith purifies Gold. This means, that God will continually be throwing us things that we do not like. Things that burn away anything that we hold onto in this life. Things that we truly hold dear, and do not want to let go. He will take away our pride, our love of material possessions like clothes, cars and houses. He will take away anything that gets in the way of our relationship with him. Why, to make us into the vessel he would like us to be, not the one we want to be. All God asks, is utter-complete-total surrender, absolute obedience, and implicit reliance on him. Isn't that great, we get nothing to call our own. But we do get to be one of God's Children. Being a believer is the same as being a servant, for eternity. That is why it is the hardest thing ever.

When we have no control over our lives, we have to live by faith. True faith is the hardest road to follow. The path is straight and narrow, and few can stay on it. People normally stray because of comfort. "Hey this job pays a ton!" Or, "this little lie will get me out of so much hot water." Or, "They didn't charge me for it, why should I tell them they made a mistake." Or, "No one saw me hit the car, I'm not leaving a note." All to your benefit and comfort. Doing the right thing in all of those situations is really hard. Others stray for tangible security. Money in the bank. Medical insurance at this job. Retirement planning. But God asks us just to rely on him. That is why it is the hardest thing ever, it is very hard to trust everything to faith.

My grandfather loves to talk about LMDs, last minute deliveries. Meaning God delivers us from our troubles at the last possible moment. Why, because by then we KNOW we are helpless to control the situation, and that deliverance can only have come from God. Even putting it this mildly, it does not even begin to describe the difficulty of the situations we as servants face, and face often. God systematically runs us through his boot camp, by tearing down any structured belief we had about ourselves, and replacing it with Himself. Where we once had self reliance, we now only have God. The ripping of those things away from us is EXTREMELY painful. That is why it is the hardest thing ever.

Why with all of this trouble should we become Believers and life long Servants. It is obviously the benefits. If God is in control of everything, and he is, he will always take care of you and give you what you need. Not what you want, what you need. He will give you the Liberty of spirit, peace, comfort, the feeling of security, love, and wisdom. None of these has a monetary value really, but spiritually, they are priceless. When Grace finally descends upon your spirit, there is no better feeling in the world. Nothing more free or wonderful. Nothing better than knowing that I don't have to worry, because at the last minute, God will take care of me. Yes it is the hardest thing ever, but the most rewarding thing ever.


jON said...

yes, yes, yes. it is the hardest thing in the world, but once started, it is also the easiest thing in the world. when once you have the benefit of hindsight. the hard thing is letting go and trusting. but once you do, you realize how easy it is because god can be trusted. in fact, he is the only thing that can be trusted. because he's not looking to fuck you over like some credit card or insurance company. he actually has our best interests at heart and is longing to wow the fuck out of us if we will but let him.

but as he will, not as we will. john the baptist had all the camel hair he could wear and locust he could eat. isn't that fun? but his needs were met. god met his NEEDS and as a result was able to pull him out of the worldly system to do something else... and what a hard lesson it has been for me this past year to rely on god and not on paychecks and credit cards and insurance for my needs. but once there, you can ALWAYS count on it. because god is not a liar. he will do as he said. he will provide all the while refining and cutting and pruning and testing and comforting and loving and calling and pushing and all sorts of other terrible and wonderful things.

thanks for joining the fray. i enjoy reading and contemplating your thoughts.

Valorosa said...

Amen :-)