Throwing Out The Baby With The Bath Water

Being somewhat gone from the proceedings and precesses of those out there that have been continuing to go through religious realignment, has given me a pretty clear and unbiased picture starting to come through. That picture is really startling.

We have completely come to the correct realization that organized religion for the most part is complete bullshit. No problem with that. We threw out the bath water.

But them, we started questioning everything, like ourselves. We lost confidence in ourselves. Second guessing ourselves. If we were taken in by this, how can we trust our own judgement? I will tell you, that you were not taken in. How can this be? Because you just did not have enough information to make the correct decision. It wasn't deliberately being witheld from you. But we got the information anyway. How? Through bible study. The thing that our churches wanted us to do, caused us to fall away from the church. No, let me refrase that, we made the correct choice of moving towards God. But with the shaken confidence in ourselves, led us down roads that we never would have travelled if we still had the confidence in ourselves.

So in questioning our fitness for being wise judges, some have chosen not to choose, and there fore not be right or wrong. This to me is throwing out the baby. We have decided that instead of blaming the organization of humans, that do crap wrong all of the time, we started blaming the entity that was being exploited. We start saying that the entity that has sustained itself for thousands of years, really isn't there. Where are the druids, the followers of baal, and the followers of the aztec Gods that required human sacrifice. Yes the Hindus and Buhda have been around that long too. The bible even says there are other Gods. But do we reject what we once loved because someone else used there requtation badly. Would we hate Billy Graham if we found out that a group using his name without consent, got you to give a large amount of money to them? Just a thought.

But when cleaning the bathtub, it is as important to know what to throw away, as it is what to keep.

I Miss Him Still

Going along with the last post, reading one posting reduced me to utter sobbing and tears. "He Was A Good Shit" 1/1/2008. It was the feelings that I had for my father, right at the time of his death. I am glad those feelings are still there, and still that strong. It would really be a real disapointment to find that they ever leave.

The Longview

My grandfather, who I have mentioned many times on this blog, printed out all of my posts, and sent them to me. I have not called him to ask him why. But I will, I am very curious to see why.

Rereading them without having to continuously click and adjust the screen to see the whole post put in a completely new perspective for me. Those things were influenced by all of the people that were part of the blog experience. Thank you for that. It has created a strength and peace that I truly thought could not exist. Thank you.

How I Decided: Part Deaux (Starring Charlie Sheen)

OK, no Charlie Sheen, but just some more thinking.

Another thing that I had decided to do, was to give myself a break, and allow myself to be human. That means not perfect. Those that I talk to here, I can feel the want to be all that they can be. Well, God accepts everyone, so why do I have to be perfect? That leads back to "We must give God our best." Well, at the time, I was wheeling so badly, I wasn't giving Him anything. 50% of something, is better than 100% of nothing. Anyway, I stopped torturing myself, and just let myself believe what I do now, and be comfortable with it. May I learn something down the line that changes what I believe, absolutely. But it doesn't stress me that it may happen.

How I Decided

Recently, Michelle inspired me to define my beliefs. They were simple, but living. Not dead as in a book. Even the bible to me is basically a dead thing. But an actual living entity all its own. The Holy Spirit is in me, and I listen to him/her/it, and follow its urges as communication from God. I do not wallow in books, or listen to learned men/women, or follow teachings or theories, trying to figure out who I should make myself become. I am me. I do not need to be anything else. I can't be anything else. So why try?

Where did this come from? Unconsciously, I just said, ENOUGH OF THE SHIT!!! Enough of the the endless debates and searching for the next WOW of philosophies or spiritual data that will come along and define me. I decided, it was time for me to define me. Not the others in the world. So, I decided to decide. I decided, for faith. Faith for things not seen, but believed in. Is it rational, or scientifically provable. NO. But it is what I have decided to believe, and tough shit to anyone that doesn't like it. I am not throwing it in anyones face, or being antagonistic with it. But I will not change to please anyone basically.

Like I said earlier, to me it is a living thing this relationship I have with God. He blesses me, I feel his presence, I feel his hand upon my life. That is all the proof I need to believe, and have faith.

Sho'nai

Recently I was ask to define what I believed. That hasn't happened to me in a while. Finally it came down to this. With all of the mountainous amounts of information in the world. The only thing that I know for a certainty, is if you show me information to prove something, I can find information to disprove it. Whether within the bible, scientific texts or anything else for that matter. Especially in science. We are so far from even beginning to understand science it is beyond belief. I suppose it is our ridiculously limited perspective spectrum. But I digress. Basically what I am saying is, that there is no proof or certainty of ANYTHING in this life. I am not guaranteed to wake up tomorrow. I just have to take it on faith that I will. That is the crux of it, FAITH.

Where nothing is certain, belief only comes through our faith that it is. I have never gone to an observatory to prove that the astrological information that has been told to me is correct. I have no tangible evidence AT ALL that what has been told to me about the rings of Saturn is true, because I PERSONALLY have never seen them. Does that mean that they do not exist. No, I have NO proof at all. But I have faith.

Faith in those that depart the message. In my heart I know it is true. That is where all of my searching has taken to me. Inside. To my heart. Inside I believe. No matter what anyone says or does, I have decided to believe. I have decided to have faith. Period. So what does that mean to me. Sho'nai.

It is a game played by a warrior race in a book I was reading. They throw knives at one another, and catch them. It is symbolic for their life philosophy. To cast (as in to throw) themselves out (as into the unknown). I have done this, with the only safety net my Faith in God. It works great, so I will stick with it.

Jesus, David's Lineage?

Jesus will be of King David's lineage. So the prophecy says. So here is the question. Since Jesus was a virgin birth, was Mary of David's lineage? For I am sure God is not. Does anyone know the answer to this question?

Why do I ask since Joseph was of David's lineage? Joseph was Jesus Stepfather, think about it. He was not the biological father. So, was Mary of King David's lineage?